Letter from Wal-Mart

This is why women should not take men shopping against their will. Recently, Melinda has insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart (to make up for lost "date nights"). Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, Melinda is like most women... she loves to browse. Yesterday she received the following letter from the local Wal-Mart.

Dear Mrs. Bedwell,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Bedwell are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of apple juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.'
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the anti-depressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
And last, but not least
15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'
Regards,

Tom Richards
Wal-Mart Manager

Just kidding, someone posted this on one of my Mountainbike forums and I thought it was funny. And for the record. We do not shop Wal-Mart (except for gas--- you know, if you use the gas card, you get 3 cents off per gallon... plus it's mostly North American oil as opposed to mid-east and South-American).... anyways, we don't shop wal-mart except for last ditch efforts... we try to buy local 1st, then small buisness, then bigger buisness... you get the picture...

Hope all is well with you guys... oh, and fair warning... I feel a big, smarty-pants political RANT coming soon... so keep an eye out.

Later,

Scott

NON-COMMITAL

Scott has really been at me to write a blog lately (my first) and something he asked me last night stuck. He asked what my favorite movies were- they are not all the same as his. Well, I thought for awhile and have come up with a list but before I blog this it comes with a disclaimer: I have not actually sat through that many movies w/o falling asleep(the usual), getting up and doing something else, or just not being interested enough in a particular film to spend seven bucks to see it. I really hate the 2 hr. commitment required to watch a movie. Give me Law and Order or The Closer any day -1 hr is a commitment even I can handle! I actually slept through most of a Star Wars movie- only woke up during the fight scenes- in a theater with surround sound! I am now being treated for my narcolepsy so that doesn't happen very often but my attention span is rather short (still) and there are lots of things to be doing. Alot of these movies are from a younger age and the ratings and/or content may be questionable but here's what I like/d and in no particular order of preference
Willy Wonka : I loved Gene Wilder in this -sort of creepy, definitely strange, and very honest,at least about human nature.
It's A Wonderful Life : maybe I need to watch it now in light of all the turmoil in the world, it is full of hope.
Harold and Maude: I know the concept of a young, rich, nihilist falls in love w/ a life loving geriatric is weird (and kinda gross) but it really was a positive affirmation about life (even though Maude purposefully o.d.'s on her 80th) and the soundtrack is great--Cat Stevens before he renounced his music and became a Muslim.
Tender Mercies:Robert DuVall in a very understated performance about change and redemption from the perspective of a sober alcoholic country music singer.
Red Rock West: I saw this a long time ago(1992) but I remember really liking it. Nicholas Cage and some crazy identity mix up w/ lots of strange characters.
Short Cuts: speaking of strange characters, this was out around the same time. It probably has some really horrible language and sex in it but I just like all the character developments. Based on the short works of Raymond Carver if I'm not mistaken.
Crash: this was a very powerful movie. So deep and so in your face honest-it was sometimes hard to watch. I would love to recommend it to even younger people but the language- the "f" word in particular prevents that.
Mumford: we just watched this on cable the other night. We both really liked this tale of finding yourself, even when you aren't really who you say you are. It was another one of those ensemble casts I'm so crazy about, also about love, hope and redemption
Raising Arizona, Tootsie, Spinal Tap : I love to laugh.
I really enjoy those football movies like Remember the Titans, Invincible, Rudy, and that new one w/ Ice Cube about the girl football player ;those underdog stories get me every time. There have been other films that I've enjoyed watching w/ the kids: Zorro, Fried Green Tomatoes, A River Runs Through It , and even The Birds:the kids loved these movies.
To Kill A Mockingbird; a classic (both book and film) too bad we don't have more Atticus Fitches in the world today.
So this is a working list and does not include those previously mentioned in our opening profile.
This is dedicated to you, Scott, because I can always talk to you and you'll get what I mean, usually anyway. Next topic please! Love, MOMO

miscellaneous

Yep, here's that random post which combines snips of a lot of things that I've been meaning to "blog" about but haven't made time to do it yet.

1. My folks visited a while back. It was just after school started (I think). I'd been bugging them and bugging them to come up and finally they did (actually Dad had been up a couple times for bike trips or a canoe trip, Mom just hadn't been up in a while... yes, it's way past time for us to pay them a visit... we will, we will.) Well, when they got here, we hung out, ate, went to a movie, did fun "visiting" type stuff. After they acclimated for a day or two, we decided to take them "Out"... you know, to do FUN stuff... so we drove them a little more than an hour away to this real cool place called "Rock Town"... it's on top of Pigeon Mountain which is a mountain plateau that parallels (on the south side) Lookout Mountain-- Chattanooga (but still in Georgia).

It was a nice visit, here's proof:

Oh yeah, we had to hike a mile from the parking lot out to where the rocks were, it wasn't a bad hike though, here's my Mom and the gimp (Dad has a partial knee replacement, jacked up back and he can't raise his right arm due to a pending shoulder replacement... we still love him though and he's one heck of a trouper!) Oh, Yeah!!! My girl got some climbing skillz!!! Not sure why she decided not to smile though.
Here's a shot of one of the part monkey, part mountain goat, part cheetah that we've been raising for about 10 years now... He can climb just about anything.
Just like big brother right?
Funny thing about these cracks in the rocks... some of them only had 20 ft. drops, others dropped for 40, 50, or 60 feet... I'm not particularly afraid of heights, I just get a little nervous when my dad and my son jump back and forth across these things trying to scare me... ask Dad how that turned out for him the next time you see him... (he made it across one that he almost didn't get back across... yup, he almost took a fall... probably would've been his last).
This is a really cool place and no pictures could do it justice. You just have to go there.
Melinda and Mom chill a bit while Macho man flexes for the camera.
After a nice visit with the rocks, it's time to head back to the car. As you can see from this picture, everyone was energized and ready for our next adventure.
It was a good visit and I'm very thankful that my parents are game to so many of my shenanigans. I'm already planning their next visit. Dad says downhill mountain biking is out of the question ever since the incident on the Pinhoti trail (between Ellijay and Fort Mountain) last year. So,..... I guess it's going to have to be hang gliding instead!!

2. Let's see, I already told you about the Canoe trip, so I think next we went to Ginger's for Jonathan's birthday (he turned 12 and was ordained a Deacon). You can catch highlights from this on Ginger's Blog. Here's a couple pics. It was a nice visit... We took the kids on a stroll through the Bamboo Forest in Prattville, AL. (just down the road from the High School that I graduated from--- I only lived there my senior year... it was o.k.)
I learned a valuable lesson on that visit. That lesson is this: If I ever intend to play cards with Dad and Blake (Gingers Husband) again, then I must acquire a prescription for Valium or Xanax for me and/or for them. They figured out how to push my buttons that night... It had been a stressful week and I was sleep deprived as usual... 'Nuff said.

Moving on:
3. Kittens... I may have mentioned that we have kittens... actually we got them mid to late June, but I'm finally posting about them... We had a cat named Spike-tail that we got when Stanton was a baby... he was a cool cat... half Manx/half something else... purely and outside cat... a mouser... Well, long story-short... he got poisoned by the tainted Chinese cat food, ended up with liver failure and died last October (I think)... he's buried in the woods beside our house. Here's a picture of "Spike". Looks thrilled to be held, right?
Yeah, I know I said he was an outside cat, but every once in a while, he'd scram inside while we were fixing him some fresh water, but he lived 98% of his live "Guarding" our home. We'll miss him. So, about these new kittens, they're actually looking more likes cats now. Their names are Bootsie and Aloe. Brothers, but look like they're from different families. These cats are curious!!! They are hilarious too. They've been in/out cats lately, but as soon as we get their family jewels removed, they'll be full blown OUTSIDE cats. Ever hear the phrase "Who let the cat out of the bag?" Bootsie is the one in the bag, Aloe is just guarding the entrance. Here's a little bit of footage of what they do many times a day and every night from 10:45 to 11:45 like clockwork: (the footage is from when they were quite younger ):

No, we're not what I would call "Cat People"... you know, folks who eat, sleep, breath "Cats"... and I don't think that we smell like Cat Pee either.. you know the kind I'm talking about... Stereotypically they are single women in the 40 to 80 year age group who only go out to buy more cat food and kitty litter. Our kittens are DANG CUTE though.... gotta admit it.

4. Stanton's Birthday! Turned out to be a pretty big ordeal. I think we last counted close to 40 people (probably 2/3 kids). We were running our usual 1 1/2 hours late, but with the help of some of our early guests (thanks to the Giles, Yandows, Campbells and anyone else I may have forgotten to mention), it came together nicely. We grilled hot dogs, Conecuh sausage, chicken, and pork shoulder/Boston butt (slow cooked/pulled pork style)... with usual side items and finished it all off with Melinda's Famous Chocolate Cake with Chocolate Mousse filling and Ganache Icing. Stanton and the rest of the kids had a good time, as did the Adults (me too)... before it was all over, I had some of the men on Melinda's and my mountain bikes roaring up and down our trails... I think Todd Campbell and Jorge Bueno even rode on the teeter-totter that we built on the trail (one of our "intermediate" rated stunts)... Maybe for my birthday in November I can have all my friends come over and ride bikes again!!! Here are a few pictures from Stanton's celebration: Yes, that is in our garage... how classy of us.
I think the cats were the only ones who didn't enjoy the evening. Thank you for everyone who came, we enjoyed it... after living here for more than 2 years, we finally had guests over and the house didn't burn down after all. We did miss our friends and relatives who were not able to join us in the festivities... maybe you folks can make the next one.

Well, I'm running out of time and thoughts. See y'all soon (hopefully).

Later,

Scott (and Melinda if she ever decides to "Blog") Bedwell

Happy Birthday Stanton and Jessica!!!

Well, this is a big Birthday Weekend. Stanton (our baby) is turning 7 y/o, and Jessica (my baby sister) is turning um, well, she's um turning ... well, ehhh um, you can ask her through the link on our blog... I can tell you this: I'm turning 36 this November and Jessie is just shy of 7 years younger than me.... ;) So, Happy Birthday Jessie!! We sure do miss you and your family. We hope to come visit sometime this winter (fair warning)... for those who don't know, Jessica and her gang live in Wal-Martland, Arkansas and we live in Euharlee, Georgia (45 minutes from Atlanta and 30 minutes from Rome, 75 minutes from Chattanooga).

It seems like forever since Jessie was my curly haired little sister who flipped Mom the bird in the bleachers at Neighborhood Park in Saraland, AL during one of Chris's little league games.... a move that led to the accidental Head-Bash against the hard shoulder of the couch... Mom was upset but not THAT upset... I'm not sure if it knocked some sense into Jessica or knocked the sense out of her.... (joking of course)... it definitely shook Mom up...

It also seems forever since she lived with us in Orange Beach, AL for a summer right after Ethan was born... this was where Jessica trained to be a master Chef in the kitchen of Mangos on the Island (a restaurant made famous by uh-um, yours truly).

Now she is mother of 2 (soon to be 3) and wife of 1 (Ryan... who has surprisingly come out of his nerd cave and seems to be developing an addiction to cycling... I knew he'd come around!!) So anyways, Happy Birthday Jessie-Mac!!

OK, moving right along. Stanton, our little Cherubim. It's hard to believe he's turning 7 already. Melinda and I have been blessed beyond comprehension with the two wonderful spirits that the Lord has entrusted us with. Both of our boys are so vibrant, smart, and energetic that it can be tiresome to be around them for extended periods of time without proper preparation and orientation. Not to leave Ethan out, but because it is Stanton's Birthday, I'll come back to Ethan in another post.
Let me just tell you about Stanton Valor Bedwell. He came into this world wide eyed and full of wonder. He hasn't changed a bit. He's excited, inquisitive, passionate, spiritual, and loving. He loves the outdoors. He loves mountain biking, bmx'ing, hiking, camping, canoeing, tubing, climbing trees, climbing rocks, climbing anything actually. He loves playing with his friends (which definitely includes his big brother, Ethan). He love his Family and misses them when he's not around them. He sometimes (just out of the blue) will express his longing to see his cousins, aunts/uncles, or Grandparents who he hasn't seen in a while. He will lovingly inquire of Melinda's parents, who died when he was too young to remember them, and express his desire to have known them. Stanton loves going to church and being in Primary (children's Sunday School). He has an impressive knowledge and understanding of scripture stories and of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. His favorite scripture story is from Mosiah 12 (found in the Book of Mormon). It's when Abinidi testifies before the wicked King Noah and his priests. (If you are one of my non-LDS Friends, this is not the "Noah's Ark" Noah from the Old Testament... different era, different continent, gimme a call, I'll be glad to chat with you about it... better yet, I'll let Stanton talk to you about it).
Anyways, before I let my ADD get the better of me. Let me tell you about this past Monday morning. Being that we have two vibrant, energetic lads in our home, there is usually a plethora of small toys and pieces of toys (e.g. Lego's...) to step on in the floor. Well, Monday morning was no exception. I came home from work around 8 a.m. and got ready for bed. I had not even started to dream when Melinda woke me up with one of our kittens in her hands and said: "Scott, something's wrong with the cat, look at him!" The cat kept making this yawning motion and would paw at his face. He didn't seem to be in major distress as I could tell that he was breathing and somewhat calm. Melinda was a bit more excited, as she had noticed him doing this for some time and thought that something bad was happening. (the reason why we have these 2 kittens is because we lost "Spike-tail", our 6 year old Manx to the tainted Chinese cat food which caused his liver to fail last year). So being the Nurse that I am, I continued to assess the cat by the usual nursing method, you know: Airway, Breathing, Circulation (in that order)... as I looked in his mouth I saw something lodged between his upper teeth that encompassed his whole upper pallet. With Melinda holding him, I was able to pull this thing out, the cat shook his head a couple times, smacked his lips, then ran off to play with his brother. It turned out to be a round magnet from who knows what (Ethan is in a deconstructive phase where he likes to take things apart, he just hasn't made it to a reconstructive stage yet). So, I wash my hands and go back to bed. Fast-forward to 3 p.m.: The boys come in from school, I hear Melinda telling them about the cat so I get up and go downstairs. I reinforce what Melinda has told them and Stanton says to me something to this effect: "Daddy, during the 'Moment of Silence' this morning (they're not allowed to "pray" in school, so they have a "moment of silence" after their Pledge of Allegiance every morning) during the 'Moment of Silence' this morning, I had a bad feeling in my heart about the cats. It felt like something was wrong, so I said a prayer to Heavenly Father that the cats would be O.K. when I got home from school today." I was taken for a moment because I realized that when Melinda woke me and all that went on right about the same time Stanton would have been in his Moment of Silence. I gave him a hug and thanked him. I asked him if he always prays during the Moment of Silence and he said "Yeah, usually" in a nonchalant kind of way. I then encouraged him to thank his Father in Heaven that the cats were o.k. and for hearing is prayers. It may not seem like much to some of you, but when my kids say or do something like that, it really touches my heart. Being a parent is often very humbling, and when your children prove to be embracing Gospel principles and concepts (like prayer), well that's just plain inspiring!
Please don't think that I'm bragging (which I have no problem doing) about Stanton, but I consider myself beyond fortunate to have him and Ethan as my sons and Melinda as my wife.
Anyways, that's all for "Getting to know Stanton, volume 1". Wish him a Happy Birthday.
Happy Birthday Stanton, I love you buddy!

Update on Change

So, as I mentioned on the last post, it looks like I'm finally going to get off of the NIGHT SHIFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I got one of the ICU manager's signature on my transfer request so all that really needs to happen is the ICU manager and the PACU manager have to come to terms on what date will be my actual transfer... based on staffing issues in the ICU, and the fact that someone has to train into my charge nurse position, it looks like they will try to keep me for the maximum amount of time which is 6 weeks... I proposed that we just finish out this schedule (which is through Oct. 18)... I guess we'll see.
Well, tomorrow (Thursday) I will work a shift in the PACU just to check it out. I'm pretty stoked. The work itself will not be as challenging as working in ICU, or at least the acuity level of the patients will not be as sick or demanding as the ICU, but it's different in the PACU... It's like "Turn & Burn" (to borrow from my old restaurant lingo)... you know, "get 'em in--- get 'em out" kind of thing. Anyways, I'll let y'all know how it turns out.
Later,
Scott

Time for change!

Ok folks. Here it is. (If you happen to work with me, do not let this out just yet, I need to make sure it's solid!) I doubt that anyone I work with reads this, but there is a link to our blog on every email I send so, ..... you never know!!!

Well, most of you know that I've been working every night, many weekends, and many many holidays for the last 5 or so years... and before that I worked 'till at least midnight 5, 6 and sometimes 7 days a week; plus just about every weekend and holiday for about 10 years right?

Well, my (and Melinda's) prayers may be answered. I'm just asking that y'all remember us in your prayers too. I have had a couple informal over the phone interviews for a position in the PACU (Post anesthesia care unit... aka: "recovery room") and will have a face-to-face interview on this Wednesday morning. It will be a transfer in the same hospital so there will be no change in pay... in fact, I'll be loosing between $3-$5/hour in shift differentials & etc. but hope to make some of that up in "on call pay". The gig is from 10 am to 6 pm Tuesday-Friday (yeah, that's only 32 hours week, but being on call 1 night a week + coming in early or staying late some days adds up... and I can always pick up a shift or 1/2 shift in the ICU at a moment's notice....they are always in need)... besides, with this schedule, if we find that it's necessary, Melinda can get a part-time job for a while. If Wednesday works out (which in talking on the phone with the manager, it sounds promising) I could be on days within this month!!! That means I can eat and sleep the same time my wife and kids are eating and sleeping, I can function like a real person... You just don't know how bad I need this!!! Hopefully I can lose some weight, lower my blood pressure and cholesterol by having regular sleep patters... and another plus is the fact that there are showers so I can get a bike ride in before work and just lock my bike on the rack. We don't have showers in ICU so I haven't had that luxury... Anyway, we are pretty excited, but are trying not to count our chickens before they hatch. I just wanted to let y'all in on it. BTW, surgeons don't schedule procedures on weekends and holidays, so unless it's emergent and I'm on call (which is every 8th weekend), then no weekend work unless I'm picking it up in the ICU. Pretty cool.
So, the moral to the story: Prayer Works. Please remember us in your prayers.
Later,
Scott

Messy M.E.S.S.

Well, it's Thursday morning, I just got in from work. It wasn't a bad night, my patient was pleasant (my first Muslim patient that I can remember... nice guy)... yes, I did say Patient and not Patients.... that's because in a Cardio-Vascular/Surgical Intensive Care Unit, most post-op open heart and some vascular and neuro patients are 1 on 1 (1 nurse/1 patient) for the 1st 12 to 36 hours +/- depending on acuity... actually, many times the patient may be 2 or 3 on 1 (2 or 3 nurses/ 1 patient) for the first couple hours... until the patient is stable enough to be 1 on 1...
So, enough Nurse talk 101, there will be a quiz next week...

I figured it was time to post again, by the way I fixed the pictures on the "Can you canoe" post... check 'em out. I named this one "Messy M.E.S.S." because looking around the house, I realized that we (M. elinda, E. than, S. tanton, S. cott) are some messy folks... most of the time it's o.k. because we're not Dirty people, we are just unorganized and cluttered enough to be messy. Hey, we don't sweat the little stuff... I have to admit, Melinda does way more than her share of cleaning the kitchen and living room and even the kids rooms, and I probably don't quite do enough (but I take care of the grass cutting, garbage taking out, some cooking, and working... +/- other stuff)... the boys, well, they are a work in progress and I'll report on them later. I'm not posting to complain. I'm just saying that we're a bit messy, that's all. Here's the thing... I've seen folks with twice as many kids as us who keep a spic and span home... I don't get it. I mean, are they like constantly sweeping, mopping, dusting, vacuuming, washing, folding, wiping... or are they just that anal or "O.C.D." that they are super conscious about every little speck, drop, footprint, hair, etc. that nothing gets by them and are their kids the same way?
Frankly, it annoys me. When I walk into someones home and it looks like nobody lives there because everything is so nice and neat and orderly and clutter free... pictures are arranged neatly, no dishes on the table or counters... no shoes, toys, clothes, and papers spread throughout the house... I get kinda nervous. I mean, I'm afraid to walk... "should I take my shoes off?"... "am I allowed in this room?" these are things that go through my mind... if I wanted to go to a museum, then I would have gone to one, but NO! I chose to visit someone in their home, but it appears that I took a wrong turn because there's no sign of life here...(more of my thought process...) All I'm saying is jeez! If you really want to show some hospitality, drop a coke and leave a nice stain in your carpet, leave a load of laundry on your sofa so I can push it aside and sit down, kick your shoes off at the front door so I can stumble on them when I come through... then I'll feel welcome when I visit.
I'm a family kinda guy, my folks were up here this last weekend and yes, we straitened things up before they got here(I actually scrubbed the whole bathroom...yeah, I know), but when they arrived, they KNEW that someone lived here... they knew it was us and I hope they didn't take offense to it but rather felt welcome. Now I know that my sisters may end up reading this and I'm pretty sure that they can and do relate, but to you other readers (if there are others), try mixing it up a little bit... how 'bout helping your kid with a school project and leaving everything in the middle of the dining room table for a few days, then throw a picnic blanket on the living room floor and having dinner in the floor for a couple days. While that's all going on, make sure to invite some of your "Type A" friends over and get them in on the gig too. I think that you may just loosen up a bit and have a better, more rounded outlook on life.
Go on, give it a try.... then report back here and let me know how it went....


:)


(please don't think that people who have "lived in" homes are lazy, we're not lazy, we are just multi-tasking and happen to be on the "multi" part of the "tasking" thing.)

That's all.

Scott